Why It Is Hard To Workout For Someone Who Has Suffered From An Eating Disorder

It is crazy to think that 2 years ago I had officially identified myself with having an eating disorder. I was 20 years old, a full time broke college student, and had “no time” in my schedule to eat paired with “no money” in my wallet to spend on food. These were of course excuses. It started out as me being lazy, not wanting to pack my lunch or go out of my way to buy something off the dollar menu with my change lying around in my car, to an obsession with feeling skinny and hungry. I knew if I just pushed past the first part of the day, I would no longer feel the pit in my stomach. I was going days without eating. There were times where I couldn’t remember when the last time was that I had a meal. I was eating a fruit pack a day. That’s it. I made sure to stay hydrated because I didn’t want to pass out but I CHOSE not to eat. It was a mental demon I fought every day for months.

I remember looking at myself. All 108 pounds of me (which for me is really bad). I could see my ribs, size 0 pants were loose, I looked like I had a bobble head, and I just stared. I sent a picture to my then boyfriend, now husband, and I vividly remember asking him, “be honest, am I too skinny?” We had just recently started dating and he had no idea I had this problem. His answer was the thing that I needed. I had always thought “I could afford to lose some weight”, but his exact words were “you could afford to gain some weight.”

I opened up and told him all about my eating disorder and from then on he made it his personal goal to make sure I ate every day. I would eat a kids menu burger and be so full I felt like I was going to throw up. My stomach had shrunk tremendously, but I forced myself to eat 3 times a day. Buddy (my then boyfriend, now husband) would buy me dinner and lunch meals so I had no excuse but to eat. I hated it. I was gaining weight and my pants stopped fitting me, but when I would be angry with my weight gain I would look at old pictures and continue eating. I realized 2 things: 1. I was pretty prideful about how thin I was. And 2. I had the best boyfriend in the universe for walking through this with me and loving every pound gained.

In 6 months I had successfully gained 30 pounds! I was eating 3 full meals a day, and no longer had the desire to be hungry. Success!


Just 4 weeks ago I decided I wanted to live a healthier life style. I started working out everyday and one thought lead to another and there I was thinking, “If I skipped breakfast and lunch and only ate dinner (a small plate) my husband wouldn’t find out and I could lose weight faster.” It wasn’t even my goal to lose weight, but to be healthy. Starvation isn’t healthy! I did it for 3 days and on the third day, which just so happened to be my 3rd day of my brand new job, I was walking out to my car and started passing out. I sat down as fast as I could. Luckily I was walking with my coworkers so they gave me some snacks they had in their purses. I was sooooo embarrassed. I told my husband and he immediately identified it. Can’t get anything past that smart cookie! But he is my biggest blessing with my health. That was 4 weeks ago. The very first relapse and the very last. Sometimes when you start working out again after recovery, you want to revert to your old methods of weight loss. But the biggest concern that I remind myself of is my health, not my weight.


Post eating disorder sufferers struggle with this daily. I know it because I have been there and seen it. It’s not always easy to start working out again but I’ll tell you one thing, it sure does make you face your demons and overcome them. Hitting this head on has been hard but it has given me more healing then I even thought I needed.

How to Have Consistent Content

The question, “How do you stay focused and keep making content?” came from my Instagram follower @ali0n who is an incredible artist and lover of her totally rad purple hair (link for her profile below). This is such a HOT topic because writers block is real! Right now I have 12 drafts just sitting there waiting to be finished, but I lost interest half way through writing them and just stopped. How do you start having consistent and fluid content when there is a lack of inspiration? This is a good and really hard topic to touch on because it all depends on what type of blogger you are, but since I am a lifestyle blogger I will give you my tips and tricks!

To be able to continuously have content, there are three things you need to know before you put pen to paper

What Is The Purpose For Your Blog?

So, I am hoping that if you are starting a blog you already know which category you find yourself under. Are you life style, fashion, design, art, short story, adventure, travel, ect. ect.? The most important piece of your blog, however, is knowing why you are doing it.

My blog falls under the “life style” category. I originally chose Life Style because it has no limitations as to what topics I can talk about. However, when I first started my blog I didn’t know why I wanted to, I just wanted to do something. This made it hard to write when there was every topic at my disposal and no clear vision. Before creating a blog or publishing a post I needed to think one step further. I am not just a life style blogger. I am a life style blogger that caters to young women in the corporate/working world, encouraging them in their everyday routine and business ventures.

Suddenly all my content had purpose, it’s purpose drove my posts, and my posts had a theme. I don’t know about you but I absolutely love the show, Project Runway. When they get down to the finale, the contestants have to design and create an entire line of 8-10 pieces, the biggest factor of the winning designer’s line is not just the design, but cohesion. You could have incredible posts but if you are all over the map with unrelated topics, I promise, it won’t be as successful as you would have hoped.

The thought is: Knowing why you want to blog will create cohesion and steer your mind to the right topics that will keep you focused and helping avoid writers block.

Who Do You Want Your Reader To Be?

If you noticed I didn’t ask, “Who is your reader”. This is because you should never let others dictate what you write, instead you should make what you write dictate who reads your blog. It is important to know who you want to write to. Get into the nitty gridy with this. Don’t just say you want to write to women from 18-30 who like fashion. put yourself in your readers shoes.

What is your readers age, gender, style, what do they do for fun, what is it specifically that you write about that they can relate with? Are you an introvert, extrovert, mega punk rock lover, and how are you going to incorporate that to gain a specific type of reader? All of these things will drive unique and creative topics that will help you stay on track and motivated. Know who you want your reader to be.

The thought is: Knowing who you want your reader to be will help you because instead of posting for the whole world, you are basically writing a letter to a fellow friend.

Content Inspire Your Topic or Topic Inspire Your Content?

since I have my a clear vision for my blog and I know who I want my readers to be these are the two ways I begin a blog. Most of the time believe it or not my content inspires what I write about. What does that mean for me? This means I go out and do a photo shoot with 5 different outfit changes, and different locations. I then come back and hit the drawing board. What is it about these photos that I am trying to say? Then I write an entire blog post off of how I interpret a picture. the other way is to already have written topics down and you choose a topic and then you go out and have a photo shoot for that specific topic. Which I actually find to be harder, but sometimes my topic does inspire my content.

The thought is: Change things up if what you’re doing isn’t working. Find people who inspire you or do things opposite of what you normally do. There is no specific “right” way to get inspired.

my 3 writing tricks

After all of that there are a few things mechanically that actually help me as I am writing so that I don’t stop half way through because I am bored or have completely lost what I was going to say in the first place:

  1. I always create an outline.
  2. I write my punch lines for every paragraph first.
  3. I never stop educating myself or reading other blogs for inspiration.

I hope this has helped anyone with providing some practical tools and ways that I have content and HAPPY BLOGGING YALL!

@Ali0n instgram: https://www.instagram.com/ali0n/?hl=en

Photography by Naomi Ledford:

https://www.facebook.com/naomiledfordphotography/

https://www.instagram.com/naomiledfordphotography/

 

Turning Your “Work Brain” Off

As someone who enjoys working and being busy, this was hard for me to grasp. When I am in something I am full force, pedal to the metal, submerged. This can be good in moments when I need to be attentive or exude a lot of energy, but also a down fall.


When you are growing up you have shift work jobs where you work 3 times a week, four hours at a time. When you get into corporate America, you work at least 40 hours a week, which breaks down to 8 hours a day of work and one hour a day for lunch. Although you technically work 40 hours you are away from home for at least 45 hours, not including your drive. On a “normal” week I leave my place at 6 am and get home around 5:15 pm. I generally pump myself up for work on my way there and decompress on my way home which means I am spending a little over 11 hours in work mode. IT IS HARD TO TURN OFF. I tend to find myself having a hard time clocking out mentally at 4 pm along with my body.

For the first couple months of my job in corporate, I dwelt on my work constantly. I couldn’t take my mind off of it. I was excited and ambitious but it led me down a rough road. I started getting irritable, I was waking up in the middle of the night with items I needed to add to my checklist, and I was panicking over everything I did.

I did hit my breaking point. I was exhausted, my co-worker had quit, we were hiring someone new, I never rested, I was working 10.5 hour days (not including the hour commute) and I couldn’t take my mind off work. My mental health had taken a serious hit. One day, I was sitting at work and felt my toes and hands starting to hurt. I looked down and there were red spots all over my feet! I went to the doctor, they took my blood pressure (which was through the roof), and found out that because of all the stress I was putting on myself, my immune system was low and I got hand, foot, and mouth disease.


This forced me to rest. I was out of work for four days and spent all day, every day, lying down. Awful, but glorious because I got so much rest! A mental vacation was what I needed. From that breaking point I have trained my brain to turn off of work mode. Mental breaks are not easy and it took practice believe it or not, but sometimes you have to choose not to think about something. here is how I did it:

  1. I started by actively doing something after work that I enjoyed, like blogging! TV and social media doesn’t do it for me, I don’t need something mindless, I need something that I can focus on that brings me joy and sweeps me away.
  2. I stopped talking about work on my free time. I still do this if something is bothering me but I try to make a conscious effort not to talk about it to fill space.
  3. I started planning events to look forward to so when I was stressed I could remember what I had planned that was going to be fun and NOT WORK!
  4. I stopped giving all of myself to everyone. When I did this I let in room to take care of myself, my husband, and my job. It became a lot easier to balance.

It gets better, but it does take time and effort.

Photography by Naomi Ledford:

https://www.facebook.com/naomiledfordphotography/

https://www.instagram.com/naomiledfordphotography/