“God gives you your needs and your needs have been provided for” I kept telling myself. It was a broken record playing over and over again like one of those moments in your life that… More
I jumped right on the back of that bandwagon. I took the enneagram test. I love these type of personality quizzes that tell you about yourself and even sometimes allow a bit of revelation to your current situation or relationships but I am not going to lie, this one stung a little. There I am clicking all the answers and patting myself on the back about myself and then the results hit me like a ton of bricks.
I read the outcome and ouch. I am a 3 and here is the first thing I read:
“People of this personality type need to be validated in order to feel worthy; they pursue success and want to be admired.” Well that was a blow to the ego. The funny thing was, I took the test so that I could validate what I already thought about myself and here is it spinning my intentions negatively but so honestly.
I finished reading it and felt like I was just picked on by the school bully. I decided to read it again but this time with a much different perspective: “I want authentic friendships that build each other up, not tear one another down. I want to be successful and a good example to young girls. I don’t give myself to a lot of people because I save it for my closest inner circle and that is okay. I am adaptable to my surroundings. I want to spread happiness with others because there is already so much negativity in the world. I am a leader, influencer, and to the core of myself, I am exactly who God intended me to be.”
When I read it this way and spoke positivity over myself it was like God was reminding me of how He sees me. I am aware that the enneagram is semi-controversial and some people attribute it to witchcraft which I do not think so, but to each their own. I also know that just because you take a 75 question test, it shouldn’t give you a definition of yourself that you should live by. But I do think that it helps you assess who you are and the miracle of the uniqueness that God has instilled in you. If you want to take the test there is a link below.
God is so faithful. He is leading us into a new season and we cannot be more excited about it! This January we will be moving to Graham, TX.
This has actually been what feels like a long time coming for us. Both my husband, Buddy, and I were born and raised in Fort Worth, TX. We loved our city and we seriously thought we would be “Fort Worthians” for life. However, in January of 2018 we decided to help out our church’s new location opening in Graham which is 2 hours from Fort Worth. Buddy was all for it but I was quite hesitant. My dad is from Graham and I had spent quite a bit of time out there and I am not going to lie, I didn’t see it any more than a random small town. I followed Buddy’s leadership and every weekend we drove out there, but every weekend I complained about it. It wasn’t that it was bad, it was that I worked in Dallas and my daily commute was a round trip of 3 hours and the last thing I wanted to do on my weekends was another 4 hour round trip. I also didn’t see the point on making connections with people when we were only going to be out there for a short while.
3 months into the year I quit my job in Dallas. It was here that the Lord started prepping our hearts. I was desperate for community and since we didn’t have that or even really wanted that in Fort Worth, we started actually investing in the people and the city of Graham. We still didn’t know what God had planned for us yet. I had gotten a new job in Fort Worth, we lived Downtown, we just got a new car that surely isn’t suitable for country life, and we were getting ready to renew our lease in July. We had no intentions of leaving.
Fast forward to July 2018. We were making amazing friendships and yet we also felt like we were missing out on a lot. We had fallen in love with the town, the people, the culture, and everything. I had heard the Lord’s call for us to move but Buddy hadn’t heard it yet. Then, one morning while we were on our way to church, making that long Sunday drive, Buddy started talking about Graham and instantly got emotional. It was then that we realized this wasn’t us, this was God. We prayed, looked at our finances, and felt like January of 2019 was the best time.
We moved in with my parents when our lease was up to save money, we applied to jobs, we looked at houses, apartments, and everything between. We tried moving earlier but clearly that wasn’t in God’s plan. This whole time we were telling people that we were moving in January and yet when they asked us about work and living, we had no answer but that “God will provide”.
There were a few times that I doubted that we would move. I had been applying for jobs and had a few interviews but the positions weren’t opening for a few months after January. We tried to get a house but nothing felt right and they never pulled through. By the time December came around there was still no promise, no place to live, no jobs, and we were just hit with one of the most expensive months in November with a lot of surprise financial obligations. My husband, being one of the most faith filled people I have ever met in my entire life, wasn’t worried one bit. I was worried.
We prayed that if Graham was meant to be then we would know because God would work in our favor and let it happen, not by us trying to force it, but simply allowing God to take control. My good friend, Darbie, encouraged me to take steps in faith towards what God had for us, so we did. We got a town-home style apartment and our set our move-in date for the first weekend in January. A week later I had an interview with a radio station and although I felt under qualified since I had no experience in radio, I went anyways and it turned out to be the perfect fit for me and I was hired with my start date on the first week of January.
Even just the other day I was stressing because moving isn’t cheap but I am and I don’t like that it is going to cost us money. But through all of this we have seen God’s hand and work in our life. He said January and he did not fail us. He has shown us his favor and his love for us through it all. I have seen how freeing it is to allow God to work on our behalf as we trusted him because when I was trying to force it myself nothing happened the way I wanted it to and it stressed me out. He is so faithful and all of this is because of him.
We will miss Fort Worth, especially with me being the most typical city girl you have ever met in your whole life, but we know that the joy and promise God has for us in Graham is greater than everything we could have if we were in the city and not following God’s plan for our lives. Being obedient to his word has been the most rewarding growth in our relationship that I could explain.
“And this is love: that we walk in obedience to his commands…” 2 John 1:6a
We are nearing the end of the year and at this point I don’t even remember what my 2018 new years resolution was. (definitely not getting fit, that’s for sure). Although I don’t remember what my new years resolution was, I do know what God said He had for me this year.
At the beginning of each year I ask the Lord for a word. One simple word or small phrase that He wants me to work on and this year I was blessed with “comfort zones”. Ouch. I felt like The Lord was telling me that He was getting ready to take me into new places with new trials but also new blessings.
I honestly had no idea what that meant and I would be lying if I said I wasn’t at least a little scared. Looking back at this year I have seen how this word has come in full swing. Like Miley on the wrecking ball kind of swing. A new job, new friends, new challenges, new ways to share my faith, new financial responsibilities, and falling in love with a new city are just scratching the surface of how my comfort zone has been stretched.
However, In this last month of the year I found The Lord telling me that this year isn’t over. He is saying that He has more. More for me, for the people around me, the church, the lost to be loved and found, the broken to be healed and restored, and the ones seeking and asking for His work in their lives to be answered.
Some of you have had a pretty rough year. I know, because I have seen the posts on social media. Some of you have lost loved ones, jobs, your significant others, and even been hurt by the people that were supposed to love you most. There is a lot of hurt in the world but there is also the greatest of hope in Jesus. He is our provider, healer, and friend. He is lifts our head and spirit. He loves unconditionally. He brings us joy and laughter. But most of all, He is our savior. God can do more with our lives in the last month than we have done all year.
Be encouraged. This isn’t the end of the year where we close a chapter of our lives. He isn’t done with 2018 yet. This is the time of the year where we set the tone for what is to come in 2019. Don’t let what happened in the last 11 months be the thing that holds you back from the blessings God has for you in month 12.